Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts

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  (586): I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts http://tfl.nu/hmun
  Replies (3) Good night (1337) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation

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  (908): my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation http://tfl.nu/55rf
  Replies (12) Good night (1706) Bad night (681)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression

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  (215): I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression http://tfl.nu/rcf4
  Replies (5) Good night (616) Bad night (3912)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.

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  (612): You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast. http://tfl.nu/3zo3
  Replies (47) Good night (29142) Bad night (1289)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.

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  (914): I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis. http://tfl.nu/cpy9
  Replies (35) Good night (4924) Bad night (1847)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.

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  (802): I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover. http://tfl.nu/tbtl
  Replies (10) Good night (5585) Bad night (1618)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed

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  (516): There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed http://tfl.nu/zayy
  Replies (5) Good night (4915) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??

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  (603): As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right?? http://tfl.nu/yy40
  Replies (32) Good night (3990) Bad night (1067)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  You should probably take note of that and make it happen.

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  (267): In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards. (267): You should probably take note of that and make it happen. http://tfl.nu/k5f3
  Replies (22) Good night (2730) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again

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  (773): Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again http://tfl.nu/5np3
  Replies (2) Good night (772) Bad night (380)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?

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  (815): holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas? http://tfl.nu/9590
  Replies (3) Good night (656) Bad night (394)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear

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  (407): Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear http://tfl.nu/b5s7
  Replies (3) Good night (1115) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior

  (226): View more from Ontario

  Little bit of both

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  (519): True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior (226): Little bit of both http://tfl.nu/0xgz
  Replies (1) Good night (507) Bad night (273)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea

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  (512): Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea http://tfl.nu/vg1d
  Replies (5) Good night (475) Bad night (273)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.

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  (505): 30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong. http://tfl.nu/knaq
  Replies (5) Good night (498) Bad night (304)

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