16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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