My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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