the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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