We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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