So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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