Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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