She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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