the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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