my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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