At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize