I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
