I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
