I want you more than these girls want KFC
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
