I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
