I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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