He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Randomize
