who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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