weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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