you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
