i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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