I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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