real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize