This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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