ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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