Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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