How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard