some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.