There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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