your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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