THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say