dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
