so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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