Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
