Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Randomize
