They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
