Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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