There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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