i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
