i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize