Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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