i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
