my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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