My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
