Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
