Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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