I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
