i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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