She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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