Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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