Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Randomize
